Adaptations of Motherhood: The Shoe Evolution

Becoming a mother changes everything about your life. I know you’re thinking “well, duh!”, but I’m not just talking about the obvious changes. Yes, you have to kid-proof your home, budget for all the things that come with adding another human to the mix, figure out how to go about daycare or living on a single income, etc. However, there is so much more to it than that!

As with all animals, humans have a choice to make when their environment changes. We can flee (aka run away) in an attempt to get away from the changes. We can fight the changes in an attempt to stay the same. Or we can adapt to the changes and learn to thrive in our new environment. When it comes to parenthood, it’s generally a good idea to try that last option.

In this blog series, The Adaptations of Motherhood, I’ll be discussing the changes (adaptations) that I (and countless other mommas) have made since becoming a parent that I never would have thought about a decade ago. Case in point: the evolution of my shoe collection.

The Discovery of my Heels

A few months ago, I heard the clip-clopping of heels on the floor above me… my boys were in my closet again, attempting to walk in shoes I didn’t realize I still had. I could hear their hysterical giggles as they attempted to maneuver in the too-big shoes. I walked in to see what shenanigans they had gotten into, and couldn’t help but laugh at the sight of two little boys tripping over each other and laughing so hard they could barely breathe. Honestly, I didn’t walk in those heels much better than they did when I attempted to wear them years ago.

My older son asked if our landlord left them here. I was confused at first until I realized that they have never seen me wear heels. In fact, I HADN’T worn heels since I was pregnant with my oldest son. I was a bit shocked at this at first. Granted, I was never a big heel wearer, but I still wore them on occasion as a teacher, for nights out, etc.

My Shoe Evolution

Once I really thought about it, it wasn’t just my heels that changed. I no longer had the sparkly flip-flops I once loved or the super cute yet somewhat uncomfortable flats I used to wear often. Why did my shoe preference change so drastically once I had kids? I’ve boiled it down to four main reasons:

1. Pregnancy Changed My Feet

My feet just weren’t the same after I had my first son. They were flatter and wider than they used to be, and my old shoes didn’t quite fit the same as before. Science backs me up on this, with various studies showing evidence of lasting changes in foot structure following pregnancy (as if we didn’t have enough to deal with postpartum!).

2. Comfort Trumps All as a Parent

Let’s face it, you can’t efficiently chase a toddler in the grocery store with heels or sparkly flip-flops on. You need a good pair of athletic shoes or comfy flats that stay on your feet. You also can’t properly puddle stomp in a pair of designer suede boots, so why waste the money (I think the little boy logic is rubbing off on me)?

3. A Serious Lack of Date Nights

As a military family, we have never lived close to relatives, and our circle of friends is constantly changing. When we do get the occasional date night out, we are usually so exhausted that dressing up just doesn’t sound fun. Our dates generally involve game nights or movies on the couch, and you can bet the only footwear gracing my tired feet are my memory foam slippers!

4. A Change in Interests

Once I had my kiddos, my love of the outdoors grew with each passing year. I now gravitate towards shoes with excellent traction and durability to stand up to hikes and trail/beach exploration. I own a rather large collection of hiking-related footwear, from boots to shoes to rugged sandals.

My Current Shoe Collection

I had the opportunity to wear heels recently for a military event supporting my husband’s promotion. Holy cow was it an experience! I felt like a pre-teen again, attempting to look cool and master the “glide” walk while simultaneously praying I didn’t fall flat on my face. It was insanely uncomfortable and rather exhausting. Thankfully, I wasn’t the only one who shed the shoes at the first opportunity to have some fun!

Nowadays, my shoe preferences revolve around practicality and multi-functionality. My hiking boots double as rain boots since they are waterproof. My everyday sneakers are trail running shoes, so they have excellent traction for chasing my youngest. I have tall rainboots for puddle stomping with my boys and a pair of worn-down Teva flip-flops that handle beach sand like a champ. Comfort is key in my closet, and I refuse to wear anything that causes my tired feet pain!

Right Before the Uncomfortable Heels Came Off

Do I Like This Adaptation?

I am a very different person than I was 8 years ago. And frankly, I’m okay with that! My priorities changed drastically when my son made his unexpected appearance 2 months early almost 8 years ago. In the years since that fateful day, I have become less selfish and judgmental. I learned to say no to things I really don’t want or need to do. I gained more patience and perspective. Oh, and I learned that comfortable feet make a dramatic difference in my ability to keep up with parenthood.

Adaptations are generally a good thing. When talking about evolving species, adaptations are beneficial, promoting survival and growth. As humans, we can adapt to a remarkable amount of scenarios. We are resilient. I look forward to seeing what other adaptations I make as a mother. Who knows, maybe someday I will begin to love those gorgeous heels and sparkly flip-flops again. However, at the moment, the odds are not with that footwear ever joining my shoe collection again.

Have your shoe collection, clothing style, or interests evolved since you joined the parenting ranks? Let me know how in the comments below!